WORLD TOILET DAY

 CELEBRATING WITH YOUR TOILET:

“Doctor Sahib, please do something or else I am going to die!”Retired head master Minaketan babu putting his hands over the belly said, agony written all over his unshaven face.

“Unless you tell me what your problem is, how can I help you?” replied Doctor Shankar while looking at the SMS in his smart phone.

“I have not passed stool for last eleven days to be precise”. Minaketan sir said while looking at the company gifted wall clock fixed just behind the doctor.

“So what? The world record is more than hundred days, so why do you worry?”Doctor retorted back.

“But sir it’s my bad habit of going to toilet twice in a day but that has totally stopped!” an aggrieved Minaketan sir replied.

 “Tell me, if your appetite is good and you are taking normal food?”Doctor Shankar asked.

 “What do you mean by normal food doctor? Yes I am on rice and Roti with Bengal Grams.”

:”Why? You must take plenty of vegetables for good bowl movement; don’t you know that, being a teacher?”

: “Doctor, if you do not mind I will ask you a question, who does your marketing for the house?”

: “You see my wife and me take our food mostly in hotels and restaurants, around three hundred days in a year. That’s the beauty of having a wife who too is also a doctor.” commented the overweight gastroenterologist.

: “That’s the problem sir. Our politicians and rich people like you are not aware of the situation faced by common men. If someone points out the price factor, someone would snub us telling that our vegetables, food grains & other essential goods are still the cheapest in comparison to other developed countries in the world.”

 “Yes, that’s right. Cows eat vegetables, me don’t like it either.” commented doctor, Shankar.

 “Doctor I am a retired teacher. The bank interest has gone down, inflation is killing us. The money which I kept in Bank may get exhausted very soon, unfortunately those like me who retired from PSU sectors do not get pension. May be after few months I have to apply for a BPL card which is not easy to get for people like me! I am not a doctor or a film star to earn till my last breath.” the retired head master said in a depressed tone.

 “That’s your problem, do not waste my time further or else I would charge double my fees over and above more constipated patients might be waiting outside. These medicines would be much cheaper and better than your insecticide spayed costly vegetables. Take a vitamin pill to compensate.” interjected doctor rather sadistically.

 “Sorry sir, please prescribe some medicine which would save me either way.”

 “You take this liquid twice a day till vegetables become cheaper.”

 After paying the consultation fees, Minaketan Babu walked to the nearest medicine shop. The pharmacists told him that these laxatives are in great demand and are out of stock due to increase in senior citizen population and vegetable price. Our head master left with a heavy heart and tried three more shops with similar results. Next day our Minaketan sir, along with more constipated senior citizens were seen moving towards lower PMG square with candles& ply cards written all over-“Down with constipation”  to celebrate the World Toilet Day with a hope that media or some politician might help them to overcome their problems.

Sanjoy Kumar Satpathy