Drug Olympic
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Human body has certain limitation
as regards physical strength, endurance, reflex and stability but experts say
with drugs these limitations can be overcome, hence the doping test in sports.
Imagine an
Olympic with drugs. Here all athletes are allowed to take anything they like;
there will be no restrictions on drug and no dope test as the name signifies.
Even the public will be allowed to take beer (free with tickets, maximum
1000ml), it will be like the IPL cricket tournament in India.
There will be
no boring events like marathon race, walking events, sword fight, and animal
participation. Total period will be for five nights only. Except the referees,
camera men, officials’ rest of the people in the stadium can smoke, take drugs.
The athletes will not be asked which drug they take, not even the champions.
There will be no sex bar. Ladies too can participate along with men and there
will be no separate events for ladies but for each event there will be special prizes
for ladies. An event where a lady comes first then the males participating in
that event has to drink the urine of that lady. This is done to discourage
under performance by male athletes and substandard participants. There will be
no dress codes for participants.
What is the
advantage of this type of Special Olympics?
You save the
agony of the athletes. Millions of dollars are saved as laboratory staffs and
chemicals will not be required for the dope tests.
As such most
of the champions of past and present used performance enhancing drugs but went
Scot free because of wrong sampling, faulty technique, bribery, money power and
political interference. Take the case of Mario Jones, she was a different type
of lady to have confessed about taking drugs otherwise I think eight out of ten
famous sports person take some form of drugs, be it in form of a diet (dogs
meat, bull’s fat, tiger’s testes etc) or medicines or other methods which is
not known to the doping experts.
If that be so
let’s see, what maximum a human body can achieve in field events or other games
and then compare them with the so called drug free sports stars? But the
question is, was there a really drug free Olympic in recent years, say in last
twenty years?
So friends
let’s wait for the sponsors to have an Olympic that will have retired or not
getting a chance(dropped) or banned
athletes or those who do not want to participate in drug free Olympics. The
prize money will be $50000(1st prize)$25000(2nd) $10000(3rd) but if tested
negative for drugs he or she will be disqualified for next year. This Special
Olympics will be held just six months prior to the main Olympics.
The
peculiarity of this “Olympic” will be maximum 50 athletes’ will be allowed to
participate from one country, no officials. The leader from each country has to
be from the participating athletes of that country. Any individual can
participate for any country but he has to become a citizen for at least two
years before the event.
An event like
this can only be held in a country where drugs are freely available and there
is no punishment for drug users.
After an
internet voting, the venue for the first “drug Olympic” will be decided. The
dates will be informed in due time.
I wish some
business house picks up this” golden Hen” and start the event before it’s too
late. If a human body can run 100 meters in 5 seconds with drugs, then let it
be why to stop this exciting future prospect of science and human limits? I
think it’s worth it to get a gold and $50000 with drugs then lead a drug free
life without achieving any thing in life!!, why not die young(adverse effects
of drugs) doing something which people will remember for hundreds of years, the
choice is yours—“go and get it”. After the ‘Drug Olympic’ there will be
analysis with other Olympics records, if no statistical difference then no
point in drug testing in further events.
NB: This is a
satire but who knows it may be a reality in future.
Written by
Dr.Sanjoy Kumar Satpathy
House no4,
Plot401/2362
At post:
Patia
Bhubaneswar751031,
India
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